Category Archives: Readings

I have a home (First place) in two different places. One is in Seoul, South Korea where I was born and raised and other one is in New York City that I live now. Ironically, though I lived in Seoul longer than here, there are no my personal stuffs anymore in Seoul. Also, although I visit Seoul, with a joy of visiting my hometown, once every two years, I even feel some nameless awkwardness when I sometimes realize that there is no my own space completely in the house. Can I say that the house in Seoul is my first place? Then what about New York where I currently live? I honestly can’t say that this is a home completely for me either. There is no family here, I’m not USA citizen, and more of my close friends are in Seoul. Nevertheless, the reason I can say that this city is my current home as well as my third place is because I am building my life here.

When I think about the things that gave me small joys, while leading a busy life, in the third places, they were the relationships with people that I have built and communications I have had with them. Although I now live alone, I have spent more time with my roommates in New York. They befriended me when I was lonely and were willing to listen to my stories. I believe, through the people I met in the shared space in New York, a completely strange place at the time, I have been able to establish a more stable life for myself here. I also have been keeping in touch with my friend from Denmark I met in a youth hostel 6 years ago. Despite the differences in destinations and places where we live and the fact that we hardly get to see each other, it seems that the Internet and SNS have enabled us to keep in touch each other. I believe the relationships in the third place I have built with the people around me, such as the people at my favorite café, the salad store staff, who remembered my name and gave me macaroon to try, and the middle-aged gentlemen I met at Central park, who gave me small tips on life during a short conversation we had, etc., are making my everyday life more diverse and warm.

Thoughts can be found here : http://interactionjournal.tumblr.com/

While reading the “Third Places” by Ray Oldenburg, two “Third Places” (scenes) came into my mind.

“Third Place” 1

The company where I did my internship this summer is located at W4st and Broadway. During the internship, I walked pass the Washington Square Park almost every morning and afternoon. In such an interesting and vibrant “third place”, this is what I saw: every morning around 9, echo from the folk guitar singer under the Washington Arch welcomed my entering the park; a group of NYU students gathered at the same place as always for their field trips; in the open area surround by summer herbs, the yoga group lying in grid breathing the morning air; homeless people find their shelter under the trees, running squirrels and wandering pigeons knew not to wake them up from the dreams on the grass bed… After 6pm, the park became an even more amazing“third place”, novel reading hipsters, Disco dancing guys, the comedy performance group, jazz band, excited tourists, chilling office ladies, laughing kids with Uncle Bubble, doodle artists… The park is a miniature of NYC that you can find all kind of amazement out of this informal gathering community. It makes me smile. Within a city with dense popularity and mostly vertical structure living/working style, the park creates a horizontal, wide “sorting areas” for people have shared interests; a safe and tolerant place for people to express themselves; also provide a sense of belonging, “the social anchors of community life”, which is essential for such a melting-pot city.

“Nor is it a coincidence that the joie de vivre cultures of the world are those in which third places are regarded as just as essential as home and work”, as Ray states in the article, ‘Joy in living’ depends upon people’s capacity to enjoy the company of those who live and work around them.” The chemistry generated by the community interaction and conversation bring life to the city, becoming one of the uniqueness of NYC’s characteristic. I think being exposure in this diverse community also help preventing falling in the restriction of “home-to-work-and-back-again” shuttle, create a psychological openness of mind.

“Third Place” 2

About four years ago, my grand parents who are in their 80s, moved into a new multi-floor apartment building. My families all felt happy about this move because the building located in the new CBD of the city they live in; the apartment was much newer and bigger than their old apartment; a within-10-minutes walk to the river side and the super market.  However, my grandpa felt depressed after he moved in. He kept visiting back to the old place that located in the old town near a train station. It used to be a community that all his old retired coworkers live in. Around the area were many small stores and restaurants along the street. In my memory the it was always crowded and chaotic.

I still remember our talk on their new balcony. “I went to my old home yesterday”, grandpa said. “Why going back again? It’s so far to take a bus from here and you must feel tired after such a long commute”, I asked. He said, “it’s still so good. I could just have a simple lunch in the corner restaurant. I could picked up a newspaper and read there, like I used to do everyday.” “But now you can stroll along the river and go to the super market, and the environment in this area is much better”. After a long while, he sighed, “People are gone. My old friends all move into new apartments around the city, we couldn’t play Majiong like the old days. I used to know all the people from those stores and restaurants, sometimes I chatted with them and their kids. Now I have no one to talk to. I don’t like supermarket… Sometimes I just felt lonely.”

I felt sad about how the new isolated urban living style rudely change the way the elderly, like my retired grandpa, used to live. As young people who has work and more social life outside of where we live, the apartment building is more of a space where we close the door and sleep. We spend our spare time elsewhere, but not for my grandpa. He can’t stay in front of the computer and TV all day like us. His routine is highly connected to the walk-distance community – the courtyard, newsstand, farmers market, tailored store, restaurant, with all the familiar connection – he need those people to build up his retired life, to spend time, to communicate information, to have neighbor’s help when emergency happened, and to have a spiritual support from the accompany that their busy younger families couldn’t provide. Perhaps it requires city designers in China of more empathy to design the “third places” for the elderly’s accommodation.

…can be found here.

Thoughts found here.

Reading Oldenburg’s writing made me think of the sharp contrast in the availability of third spaces in places I have lived in.

In my childhood years, I grew up in an urban condo building complex in Mumbai. In the evenings, all the kids in the housing association of 50 buildings played in the centralized open courtyard lawns and the association frequently held events for the kids and adults in the neighborhood. You would immediately meet all new-comers to the neighborhood, as well as get to know who was getting married, when, and other such day-to-day gossip. All building residents would regularly play “Housie” (the indian version of Bingo) on the roof. Third places were abundant here because of the ideal mix of a densely populated cluster of people and the unified cultural preference for extended families and community life in India.

In the early 90s, we moved as a family to an apartment complex in the suburban sprawl of Cupertino, California. The city was a melting pot of cultures, and was seeing an influx of immigrants, like ourselves, arriving from various parts of the world to be part of the newly burgeoning tech industry. We were shocked by the sudden emptiness in our lives. There was no one to borrow sugar from and I got a general sense that you could walk many miles into the neighborhood and not see very many people outside. In passing, the usual “how are you’s” seemed like a mere formality before people entered their well-guarded private spaces. I did see cultural pockets of third places being created, but they were private and exclusive to each culture (various asian community centers, faith-based gatherings, etc). Even when a city like Cupertino does create a public city plaza or a park, it largely remains sparsely occupied because it is still a driving distance from everyone’s houses. The “successful” third places seem to be commercially motivated. There is a rise in outdoor malls which have adopted an artificial version of the “ european plaza” look. People congregate here to shop at high-end stores, drink coffee in outdoor areas, and get a feeling that there are many people walking around them. While people are getting their third space needs fulfilled, they are paying a big price for it.

Santana Row, an outdoor “European plaza” mall near Cupertino

I think the thirst for third spaces, experiences, and a connection to people is a large reason why many people are forgoing personal possessions and space of suburbia and moving closer to urban environments.

The concept of having a “third place” speaks directly to me. As a kid, and now as well, my local comic shop was usually the only place for me to discuss with others on the then nerdy subcultures of comics and gaming. There was really no place for that type of discussion anywhere else in my life, sadly even to my closest friends.

In Oldenburg’s, Our Vanishing “Third Places”, he discusses these effects for neighborhoods. I think that concept can easily be expanded to our “passions”. Being connected to many others because of your like-passions is one of the main reasons why I came to New York.

New York, to me, is the epicenter of tight knit communities, and only continues to grow.

As Oldenburg mentions, discourse is key. It’s the glue to all of this. Every week there is a symposium on comics, which is housed between Parsons, SVA, and Columbia. There are panels and presenters who gather a small group of people to discuss the past, present, and future of the medium. The diversity of range from professional to just a reader at the symposium allows unique ideas and questions to be in conversation. This extends to my own understanding as well.

Photo: Connie Sun

Knowing that there is a location that holds a forum on the things I connect to, makes me feel more connected to what’s around me.